cancer

Dear Cancer…

February 23, 2024 by Heidi Leave a Comment

I know I still need to work on the side effects post, however, I need to address cancer and put some things down in writing.

Cancer has taken away my uterus and therefore took away my ability to have children. I will never know what it is like to birth a child, or raise a child. I mourned this years ago, but the pain still hurts. I SO wanted to be a mommy. Thank you, Cancer.

Cancer has taken away my hair, 5 times I have lost my hair during to chemotherapy. Right now my hair is super thin and honestly, I’d rather it all fall out then my hair be so stinkin thin! I always had very thick hair. I don’t know what my new normal is yet as I am still in treatment.

Cancer has made me more aware of my body. This could be good but it’s not. I get a twinge of pain in a limb and I’m looking up the side effects for all my cancer drugs. My shoulders hurt, is that a side effect? My eyes are extra blurry, is that a side effect? The answer to both is Yes.

Cancer has made me move from my glorious bedroom upstairs to sleep and live in a downstairs bedroom (it’s more like a small office) because doing stairs is not something I want to do (sometimes I can’t physically do the stairs) and it is closest to the bathroom and the kitchen is not too far away.

Cancer has taken away my social life. I didn’t really have a social life, but now I totally do not leave home unless I have an appointment. I have missed many a family function due to not feeling well.

And finally for this blog post at least, Cancer has taken away my livelihood. I exhausted my Short Term Disability at work and had to go out on Long Term Disability. I cannot do my job with these side effects., When I post about my side effects it may make more sense.

Dear Cancer…you suck big time!!! And I am tired of you.

Till next time…..Heidi

Immunotherapy – The Next Treatment

February 14, 2024 by Heidi Leave a Comment

So, we left off in May of 2023 and my next chemo was scheduled for the next day with a CT scan later in the month. That chemo was my last one. The CT scan showed that the chemo wasn’t working anymore. Most, if not all, of the spots grew and a new something popped up in my abdomen or pelvis.

The next treatment to try would be Immunotherapy. Per The American Cancer Society, “Immunotherapy is treatment that uses a person’s own immune system to fight cancer. Immunotherapy can boost or change how the immune system works so it can find and attack cancer cells.” The American Cancer Society also offers a flyer on Immunotherapy if you’re interested.

Getting the Immunotherapy approved took a few months because the tumor that was removed in 2020 needed to be sent back in for testing. I forget what it needed to be tested for. If I remember later, I will post an update. Therefore, I didn’t start the Immunotherapy until September at least. I honestly don’t remember the exact date.

In early September 2023, I went back to work – strictly working from home. I really wanted to start the Immunotherapy before I went back to work because I had heard (reading in Facebook groups) that the side effects are horrible. And I really wanted to take the drugs and see if it’s as bad as I read, or would I be able to handle it. I didn’t get the chance to do that, unfortunately.

So, the Immunotherapy I am on are Keytruda and Lenvima. Keytruda is an infusion every 3 weeks like the chemo was before. The difference is that the Keytruda IV bag takes 30 minutes to get through. The side effects – for me anyways – with the Keytruda don’t seem that bad. But the Lenvima? That is a daily pill (actually 2 pills), and the side effects are never ending. At least with the carbo/taxol that I was on before, I knew that I’d feel awful for a couple weeks and then I’d get a week or so of feeling “normal” before it was time to go back in for another infusion. With Keytruda/Lenvima, though, the side effects NEVER END!

I am going to leave this here for now and will update soon with exactly what my side effects are. I would have finished this during the weekend, however, I was sick…throwing up sick. Meh.

Until next time…Heidi

Hello there…

March 31, 2023 by Heidi Leave a Comment

Now that I know I can send in posts from my phone I may post more often. Or I may stop again before I get started because life is too overwhelming.

First, a little bit about me. My name is Heidi and I live in Michigan – hence, the Mitten. I’m in my late 40’s and don’t have any kiddos. My pets are my kids. Currently I have 2 dogs – Dasher and Willow – and 2 cats – Lily and Jasper. Some of my favorites right now are: purple, pears, squishmallows, dinosaurs, The Golden Girls, rainbows, glitter, and those decorative birds that Target sells for $5.00. I don’t do a lot of reading these days, and I like watching documentaries, anything 90 Days, and comedies. Music I love varies but P!nk and Billie Eilish are favorites. I am sarcastic, quick witted, a democrat, and I believe love is love. I am an Ally to LBQTIA+ and people of color. I am also a realist – I may say this a lot.

Now onto the cancer part. I was first diagnosed with uterine (endometrial) cancer in 2011. I had a total hysterectomy and radiation. All was good, right? My mom was also diagnosed with the same cancer and had a hysterectomy and never had issues. Apparently, I needed to overdo it.

Fast forward to 2019/2020 – yep, right at the start of the Pandemic. I noticed a lump in my stomach and pain in that same area. It would keep me up at night sometimes. Initially, I thought it was Diverticulitis because it would sometimes feel better after I went to the bathroom. I got an x-ray and then was referred to a surgeon. I had an MRI and was scheduled for surgery. They were preparing for a hernia surgery because they just wasn’t sure what it was.

Surgery was in August, 2020.

Once the surgeon removed and saw the mass, he contacted my Oncologist. The result? Cancer. The same type/kind I had before. This is the first recurrence. So how they explained it was that there was a cancer cell left on the robot when they did my hysterectomy back in 2011 and that cell has been growing for the past 8/9 years. Endometrial cancer is a slow growing cancer. The oncologist gave me a few different options but the treatment he recommended was radiation to the surgical area and chemo.

I went to University of Michigan for a second opinion and they said basically the same thing. I should also add that I had a CT scan and it showed nodules in both lungs. Anyway, I decided to stay with the more local hospital and my old Oncologist for treatment.

I had my Medi port placement in October, 2020 and was scheduled for a course of chemo (6 cycles – 3 weeks apart) with radiation in the middle. So basically, I had 3 chemo, then radiation, then 3 more chemo. The chemo was Taxol and Carboplatin. I’m not going to talk side effects yet – don’t worry though, that will be coming soon.

I had another CT scan in March, 2021 and the lung nodules were gone – good news! I continued with the three cycles of chemo.

I didn’t have another CT scan until June, 2022. Results this time were not as favorable. The lung nodules were back as well as a couple of other suspicious spots. This is now my 2nd recurrence, I believe.

I guess with Endometrial cancer (not sure if this is true of other cancers) they don’t restage the cancer. So you stay at whatever stage you were diagnosed at. For me that was Stage II – I believe. Although my original Oncologist did say that this was now considered Stage VI cancer at one point. My original oncologist left the practice for Michigan State at some point during my care.

This meant more chemo for me. I completed another course of chemo – same as before with the Taxol and Carboplatin. I had another CT scan in September, 2022. The lung nodules were reduced, but everything else was as it was before.

The chemo wasn’t working anymore.

In October, 2022, I had my last chemo of that course – #7, I believe. I was tired. The side effects were getting worse with every round of chemo and I needed a break. I also needed to go back to work for a little while. I asked the oncologist to take a break and she agreed.

My next CT scan was in December, 2022 – again, everything was the same.

When I saw the oncologist again we discussed options. Immunotherapy is what sounds most promising. However, because of how insurance works – I work in insurance – so I won’t complain about it, but I KNOW it’s a pain sometimes, I need to essentially be a “chemo failure” in order to start immunotherapy.

Back to chemo I go – same as before – another course so hopefully I can be approved for Immunotherapy.

My latest CT scan was in February, 2023. The lung nodules are not showing again, which is good news. However, the other masses/tumors/lesions/spots (whatever you want to call them) are still there and the biggest one is now hurting like the one was in 2019. I can feel it also.

So this is my story so far….well, the gist of it anyway.

More coming soon as I have a lot to share.